Tuesday, August 30, 2016

In Too Deep

In Too Deep
Never done a drug before, I was always too scared to try
But this one drug caught the corner in my eye
Something came over me, my body had an urge that I have never ever could understand why
What was this drug? And why can’t I get my eyes off it?
Why can’t I shake this craving, it’s got me hooked even without a taste
I’m up at night dreaming of the feeling I can attain from just one sole hit
Man I need this drug quick before I go insane and get sick
I know if I have it everything will be great; no problem, I would be fixed
I’ve had enough, tomorrow will be the day that I intake
Thinking back on it...I think November 10 was the date
Its in me, and damn this feels better than great
I can feel it heavy in my lungs and veins
A heavy rain of happiness that I would gain
Ohhh this high is too good, mad at myself for even taking this long, but why complain
Months later, I love this drug, and this drug is the 1st feeling of love I known
Nothing else is what I want to do, except find a quiet spot and spend time with
People around me noticed a difference, I can admit that I was addicted
Overheard jokes towards me, but I don’t care, I have my drug, and this drug has me
Go to sleep thinking about it and 1st thinking about when I wake
The 1st thing I would do in the morn is take a hit and float to outer space
I was in love with this drug, First time too, Please don’t let this end god!
Year passed, and I think the side effect has set in
There’s plenty of great days me and this drug, but some days the drug doesn’t feel the same
The drug leaves me with headaches and bad stomach pains
But I’m so sorry, I just can’t leave
Every day I try for us to have that connection like back then
The harder I try, the more I feel trapped in a den
Even if I try using my head to turn my back to it, my heart will turn me around to it
And sad part is...my bleeding beat plays to the drugs rhythm every time
I’m supposed to be the user and somehow I became the used
Is it better if I stop using? Am I even strong enough to even truly try
Yes...maybe no, I don’t know honestly. Well I’m 4 days sober
And all I want is this drug back in my body no matter the pain it brings
Because I know this drug can make me feel, how I want to feel...FREE
Damn, reading this just made me realize that I’m just Too In Deep

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